There is one area of my life where I am trying to be more understanding, but it is just so difficult to do. I have worked hard to try to live my life openly as a gay dude. I have been blessed with a loving family and remarkable friends. They made my transition from closet to open a safe and loving passage. I owe them so much.
Yet, there are so many other black folks (this is anecdotal evidence from my experiences) who seem either terrified of or indifferent to coming out. Hell, some of them are truly bothered by any public association with things gay.
I have come to loathe the phrase "nobody needs to know my business." It is at this point where my understanding usually goes into full retreat. I am confident that if any of the individuals who have used that line were straight, then the world would know their business, and they would be proud to proclaim it (though perhaps unconscious of doing it).
Why the difference? Unfortunately for some of my fellow 'mos in DC, one sista took it upon herself to set the record (shall I say it?) straight in a bold way. Now this sista's tactics were indeed outrageous and unnecessary. I mean sista called them out by name (first and last, with descriptive commentary). It seemed like revenge in the first degree. But I hope that the folks who were called out will look at this as an opportunity to deal with the reality that the broader GLBT community needs their public voices, and that their families need to know the whole truth about their lives.
Nothing will change within the black community, even with Obama saying all that he can short of an endorsement of equal marriage, until the majority of the black GLBT community ends the game of subterfuge, clandestine love and silence. I am tired of being ignored by both the straight black and non-black gay communities. I know I am not alone, but at least I am willing to let people "know my business." Praise Jesus!
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