Monday, September 7, 2009

The Wizarding Skills of Obama

When word came that people were seriously bothered by the prospect of President Obama addressing American children on their first day of school, I laughed harder than I'd laughed in a long while. Then it hit me. Is this what we have come to? For all of the disdain that I had for President Bush (George W.) politically, I never felt concerned about him speaking to students (beyond using poor grammar, and a questionable public speaking style); he was POTUS.

Avoiding the easy "Obama is a scary black man" line of reasoning for this fear some on the right are showing with regard to this speech, I wondered what the source of the problem really could be.

Perhaps people see Obama the way Frodo and crew saw Saruman. One of the strongest powers that Saruman possessed was his voice. He could use his voice to persuade most to do his bidding. Maybe those fearful parents think that while adults will hear typical start of school pablum, their children will hear this:

Then again, perhaps those fearful parents are concerned that Obama will perform the Imperious curse on their children, and influence them to support his nefarious agenda. I think Professor Moody provides an excellent example as to what happens when one is under the influence of the Imperious curse:

Regardless, I am sure that those fearful parents are on to something. Obama is a dangerous man. Knowing that Obama is in power must be akin to having the Cruciatus curse cast on them daily. And of course, with regard to health care, the Avada Kedavra curse will be used on all of those deemed unworthy to continue living by Obama and his minions.

Now that I have this sorted, I've come to a conclusion: Barack Obama is a wizard who, through his speech, will use his powers to influence American children. Now whether Obama's powers are of Tolkien or Rowling origin, we will have to wait until tomorrow to see.

1 comment:

LifeLongSkinsFan said...

The only time when I was concerned about GW Bush speaking to children was when our country was under attack. And he sat there like a weakling and read about goats.